when i was young, maybe up I was 8 or 9 then., i was very much the assertive and headstrong youngster. but as the years progressed, i've become more and more like a tool, or an accessory, a part of a set, a prop, or the shadow of a room as changeable as the rising of the day..hehhe sometimes you know i have an esteem problem somewhere, or an idiom that impedes partially my sense of self. i should be more confident in myself and in my abilities, values and all ideals i uphold. and i should uphold them, i dare say, and not sheepishly raise half a hand or speak in hushed garbles so that i can cowardly 'admit' in spontaneous situations, like a stat pop quiz or a harmless inquiry..*laughs*i don't want to conform to anybody's sense of happiness, or be a jaded chameleon who must paint and repaint her face after every show. i want to be respected, to respect myself, to be expressive without stepping on anyone’s shoe.. i want to laugh, be spontaneous, have fun, and be intellectually challenged.. I want to find myself. Be what I really want me to be..

No comments: